Date: May 24, 2007 08:00 AM Title: Chapter 1
I hate to say it, but I just wasn't into this. First of all, the girl-who-finds-Lyoko-and-hooks-up-with-Odd plot has been so overworked that readers tend to overlook it. Secondly, your name is probably Brittney (self-inserts; also overlooked). It's unrealistic because the group would never accept a new member out of the blue. Also, FYI, multiple quotes do not belong in the same paragraph.
Sorry, but I can't give this more than half a star. You just have to be more original next time, okay? :)