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Super Nuclear. Rated T

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Continue or quit?

Its good, I like it
7
41%
I'd buy that for a dollar
2
12%
Needs some work but keep trying.
6
35%
Needs an overhaul.
0
No votes
Just give up right now.
2
12%
 
Total votes : 17

Super Nuclear. Rated T

Postby Rudger » Tue Jul 04, 2006 10:18 pm

I have recently been engaged in writing a fanfic to pass time. I havent gotten far enough into it to figure out a title and even though I have written four chapters I have only put up my first one here. I would like some constructive critisism so I know if I should continue or just give it up before I embaress myself. Thanks

There is some swearing so I'm gonna go with a T for Teen rating on this.

no touchy
Last edited by Rudger on Sun Jan 21, 2007 3:57 am, edited 17 times in total.
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Postby jarkobubbles84 » Wed Jul 05, 2006 1:18 am

Nice chapter 1, I liked it, just next time get rid of the all-centered stuff, okay? That gets a bit annoying after a while, but I like the plot line so far, you get an 8/10 so far. Bye for now!

Jarkobubbles84


PS I'm an author there too! This is my first post here. Bye now!
Hey this is Jarkobubbles84, Code Lyoko fan and Code Lyoko fanfiction writer. Bye for now!

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Postby Rudger » Mon Jul 24, 2006 10:48 pm

Chapter three has arrived. Not like anybody cares but anyone who remembers GK will hopefully get a kick out of it.
this now has moderate swearing so I am not sure what to rate it.

Ok, seeing as nobody has anything to say about it and the ony response besides answers to my poll was to get the next chapter out, Im just going to write one more chapter. After I update it in about a month, If nobody responds to it I will just delete the story off of fanfiction.net and stop bugging you all about it. Sound good? aw who am I kidding, Idont think anybody has even read it yet besides maybe Sithking so I give. I just dont have what it takes to write a great fanfic like Blast Into The Past. Mine doesn't even have a name.
Chapter2
Chapter3
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Postby Rudger » Tue Aug 01, 2006 7:21 pm

Sorry for the double post.
Even though I put it there as a joke, at least one person thinks I should give up. So just read the last post to see my response. I am posting a new post to bring attention to the fact that I have re written chapter three after realizing how bad the grammer was. I also added a new scene to it. I have fixed most of the grammer but I probably just missed the rest. please read and reply with any comments, good or bad. Thank you.
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Postby Shademan v.39 » Tue Aug 01, 2006 7:50 pm

It actually looks pretty good, though I don't suggest centering the text. Most people prefer to read text that's on the left side on the screen or page. Other than that, it looks pretty good.

As for the title, try basing it on what the entire plot of the story is about.

I'll be looking forward to any other chapters you'll be putting up.
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Postby Rudger » Tue Aug 01, 2006 8:40 pm

Shademan v.39 wrote:It actually looks pretty good, though I don't suggest centering the text. Most people prefer to read text that's on the left side on the screen or page. Other than that, it looks pretty good.

As for the title, try basing it on what the entire plot of the story is about.

I'll be looking forward to any other chapters you'll be putting up.


Thanks but I dont even know what its about yet. Im writing off the top of my head. and as for the centered text every time I write a chapter it looks good left side when I print it out and then when I put it on the net it stretches over the whole screen instead of being paper size and it doesnt look right to me. Your the second one to tell me this so I'm going to change it even if I dont like it. I appreciate your input. Thanks again.

Edit: I replaced them. Does that look better?
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Postby Shademan v.39 » Tue Aug 01, 2006 9:52 pm

Yeeeees, it looks MUCH better!!

From what I've read, it seems that it's basically about you starting a new life in Kadic Jr. High, and becoming part of the Lyoko team. With that being said, maybe you should make a title that pertains to never being the same, crossing the point of no return (lifewise), destiny choosing you and all wonderfulness stuff. Something like "Destiny's Chosen" or something more familiar, like "Memoirs of Rudger: Life As A Kadic Student", or something similar. Sky's the limit as to what to name the fic.

Update soon!!
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Postby Sithking Zero » Tue Aug 01, 2006 9:58 pm

Or maybe "What Is Normal? Rudger's Kadic Adventures."

Or does that have more of a documentary feel?
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Postby darktemplar » Sun Aug 20, 2006 11:43 am

Hey!
Jeremie says stiffeling a laugh

They take off weaving through the forest

They adjust themselves on their boards


I understand that you got D from English, but anyway...
Present tenses! I really hardly read this fanfiction because of these presents. I should have ignored them, but I really couldn't. Please. Don't do that again.

Anyway, plot is interesting. I'll be waiting for next chapters. So - don't give up!
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Postby Rudger » Sun Aug 20, 2006 12:00 pm

I origionally wrote the first and second chapters in the past tense but for some unknown reason I decided to switch it over to present tense and I guess I missed alot. Thanks for reminding me to fix that stuff.


LOOKIE, LOOKIE! Its finally got a name! woohoo! and it actually makes sense, to me at least.
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Postby Shademan v.39 » Wed Sep 06, 2006 4:43 pm

Like the title, Rudger! When are you going to update?
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Postby Rudger » Sat Sep 09, 2006 11:13 pm

Its finally here! the long in coming but not very awaited chapter is now on both FF.net and LFF. check it out.
As always any suggestions are welcome.
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Postby Shademan v.39 » Sun Sep 10, 2006 10:48 pm

Pretty decent chapter, though I really don't think that Mr. Delmas would cuss or call anybody who was of a different culture stupid. Herb or Sissi on the other hand...

I would definitely agree that Jeremie would flip out if he saw someone on his computer, especially if what was on there had to do with saving the world.

Nice chappie! Update soon!
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Postby Rudger » Mon Sep 11, 2006 8:52 am

Shademan v.39 wrote:... though I really don't think that Mr. Delmas would cuss or call anybody who was of a different culture stupid.

Nice chappie! Update soon!



Thanks! new chapter is already in the works. should be up by halloween. :D

I'm sure Mr. Delmas wouldn't normally do that, but after me supposedly trying to kill one of his students and scaring his daughter I figured I would show a less understanding side of the man. I like to change things up a bit. like with the contest at the end. Im sure the gang would have been much more understanding than that. :)
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Postby iambob » Mon Sep 11, 2006 3:11 pm

it needs to get to the point so i dont like dont take it personally though
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Postby Shademan v.39 » Mon Sep 11, 2006 4:13 pm

Hmm...when you put it that way, Rudger...that would make sense. I'll be looking forward to the next chapter when it comes up!
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Postby Rudger » Tue Dec 05, 2006 11:53 pm

Chapter 5 is complete! Click the link in my sig for LFF, or go to FF.net here.

Please review! I need feedback, good and bad.
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Postby Lyoko SA80 » Wed Dec 06, 2006 2:59 pm

Well to be horest not alot of fan fiction appal to me but your has the sight .The spellingor grammer from what read is off.But I'm the same (I not winching).It's very go go humour(foot down with odd gone bak into the back ). action (fighting scence at start).Thi is only to chapter 3 but you got me hooked .So keep it up .Well done .Can't wait for the nexrt few chapter.Wondering how long do you think it going to be .

Good fiction but needs something I can't explain :umm: .But over all good job. :thumbs up:
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Postby Rudger » Thu Dec 07, 2006 12:28 am

Well thanks :). I know what you mean. Even to me it seems to be lacking something unexplainable. I really don't know how far I'm going to drag this out. If I make it too long It will probably become boring and redundant but if I make it too short it will make me think I could have done better. I'm hoping to at least get 10-15 out of it, maybe more if I the people want more. This is probably gonna be the only Fanfic I ever write so I really want to make it good.
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Postby Lyoko SA80 » Thu Dec 07, 2006 5:16 am

Well that all you can do really is it rud.I like how you known what type of pick up but thinking about it some people who be confused .Personally I had to goggle image it (I want that one ).The bit when Ulrich punch rud in the face was a suprise and a good one .

Question is do I have what it takes to write a fan fic and with my spell and grammer??????????????.
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Postby Rudger » Fri Aug 10, 2007 9:57 pm

Hokay, I know people are thinking to themselves, "Stupid attention Wh*** Rudger, keeps reposting." but I'd just like to inform anyone who bothers to read my fic that I've reupdated chapter 6 with a better ending.
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