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Going way too far with the punishments?

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Going way too far with the punishments?

Postby emoBillâ„¢ » Sun Feb 07, 2010 3:19 pm

Hmm...last night, I was doing the bathroom, cleaning it and such. My mother made me redo it four times because it wasn't up to her standards, even though she never told me what I did wrong each time. After the fourth time, she said, "Fine, I guess I'll do the bathroom, then." And then proceeded to call me brain dead. And THEN took away my laptop privileges, saying that this was now a performance-based household and that I'd have to have a good performance to get any privileges back. Then this morning she stopped by Panera Bread after church and got my three other siblings cinnamon buns and smoothies, but told my sister that I couldn't have any because of last night. She always buys my siblings something special after I get punished, I guess to rub it in my face?

I'm just saying I think she's doing a little more than she needs to with the punishments. I'm seventeen, about to graduate, and she's doing stupid stuff like taking away my laptop for not doing the bathroom exactly the way she wanted it. I may be wrong, but I just think it's a little exaggerated >__>

Just needed to get that out there :3

...btw, I'm totes sneaking on my laptop because my sister and I both agree that it was stupid of her to do that xD
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Postby xiaozanghou » Mon Feb 08, 2010 10:12 am

That's really immature of your mother. Does she do this sort of thing often?
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Postby emoBillâ„¢ » Mon Feb 08, 2010 10:01 pm

Yeah, she does, sadly. My dad's called her emotionally abusive and I'm just waiting to get out of the house because she plays mind games with me, "forgetting" things if they work out in my favor and remembering things that never happened if she needs a certain edge on something. She's pretty immature, mostly buys ice cream and stuff with our food money, so I'm used to it. I was just pretty miffed at what she did and needed to rant >___>
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Postby Overcaffeinated Sloth » Sun Feb 14, 2010 5:46 pm

Awww *internet hug*

To be honest, I'm going through the same thing. My mom's decided that I at 18, am very disrespectful, and so she created this... consequence jar. It's just this tupperware box with chores written on paper. If I swear in her presence (which I've done for years... >.> ) she makes me take out a paper. For every noise I make until she calms down, I'll have to take out another one. I have to admit, it's kind of funny.... yesterday she went from one to four, skipping two or three. After that, she threatened my dad with a consequence jar... ... I got five for laughing at that one.

Actions like that, though, just happen to some people when they feel things are out of control. In my mother's case, her health is starting to falter, and her only child (embarassing... at least you have siblings to distract you mom's attention) is preparing to move out and become an independent adult. For her, it's just a small, subconscious way of controlling something.

The moral of the story is... parents, especially mothers, can go into phases where things get a bit strange. I find it usually happens in the 6-19 year old range, and a ton of other teens go through the same thing.

In the end, it's best to just remember that she's human. If she starts getting into one of those moods, you cam prove yourself superior by taking a step back. If she's getting freaked out, take a moment to think. If she pulls on of those bathroom stunts again, instead of redo-ing it, ask what she would do if she were to clean it (my fave). Don't think of yourself on opposing teams. There are no teams. There's you, and your mother. Take little moments to build up some quality time, and try to get on her good side. It'll help deflect confrontations in the future.

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