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Franz Hopper Facts

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Postby ODDCHEEZY » Tue Mar 18, 2008 8:31 pm

Franz Hopper is rated D for Death, S for Scary, And B for Because he just is…
Chuck E. exploits pictures of children having seizures in front of other kids...O_o Go Matt Langston!

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Postby Kamekai » Tue May 20, 2008 8:30 pm

Franz Hopper can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
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Postby Reesane » Fri May 23, 2008 10:56 am

Franz Hopper doesn't need a watch.

He decides what time it is.
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Postby Boss Tamsy » Fri May 23, 2008 7:35 pm

Franz Hopper is the reason Waldo is hiding! :*D
EPIC FAIL!!
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Postby Vodka's Vengeance » Sun May 25, 2008 1:56 pm

A man once asked Franz Hopper if his real name is Francis. He stared at the man until he exploded.
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Postby Sithking Zero » Mon Jun 09, 2008 10:07 pm

Franz Hopper knows where Waldo is.
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Postby Carth » Fri Sep 12, 2008 5:33 pm

Reviving because Franz Hopper is physically unable to die. And because I just happen to be on chucknorrisfacts.com.

Apple pays Franz Hopper 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Franz Hopper has two speeds: Walk, and Sit. When he sits, he types. It's of no question which is more deadly.

If you ask Franz Hopper what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he does an RTTP.

When Franz Hopper falls in water, Franz Hopper doesn't get wet. Water gets Franz Hopper.

A picture is worth a thousand words. Franz Hopper can type that in about four seconds.

Franz Hopper can make Jim talk about it. All of it.

Franz Hopper doesn't play God. Playing is for children.

Thanks to the RTTP, Franz Hopper can split the world in half yesterday.

Franz Hopper doesn't like other people using his supercomputer. The only reason Jeremie is alive today is because Aelita likes him.
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Postby matsumo itsu » Fri Sep 12, 2008 7:05 pm

The reason the human race is so messed up is because early early humans picked on franz's ancestors,which yes is still him, he created everything,and if you ask what created him,well lets say there had to be one perfect person, cause franz threatend to take off his glasses.

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Postby Sithking Zero » Fri Sep 12, 2008 9:50 pm

Franz Hopper invented RickRolling.

And Beer.

Not nessecarily in that order.
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Postby Boss Tamsy » Sat Sep 13, 2008 3:50 pm

Franz Hopper has no chest hair. Why? Because it's impossible for hair to grow on solid steel.
Franz Hopper does not play the piano. The keys duck down in terror of being pressed by him.
Franz Hopper has seen the end of Pi
Franz Hopper ordered a whopper at McDonalds and he got one
Franz Hopper can believe it's not butter.
Franz Hopper recently decided to market his urine as a drink. We call it Full Throttle
EPIC FAIL!!
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Postby TheAppleFreak » Mon Oct 06, 2008 2:21 pm

Franz Hopper doesn't have a Control key on his keyboard. He is the control.
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Postby Carth » Sat Jul 25, 2009 5:27 pm

Once upon a time, Franz Hopper wrote a Franz Hopper fact. It was so powerfully amazing and original that it took on a mind of its own and dedicated itself to destroying all lesser things. We now call this fact XANA. What was the original fact? Far too complex for you to understand.

The Lyoko Warriors will resurrect Franz Hopper on December 21, 2012. However, they will forget to rematerialize his glasses. The world will split in half.
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Postby Andy Waltfeld » Sun Aug 02, 2009 3:54 pm

Chuck Norris does not pursue Lu Bu. Lu Bu does not pursue The Boss. The Boss does not pursue Franz Hopper. Franz's notes regarding these phenomena are widely hailed as the prototype of the "fox/chicken/corn over a river" logic puzzle.

Overpopulation is the only reason the positions of "Franz Hopper" and "The Guy" are no longer one and the same. One guess which is still more highly regarded.

Fractals only exist because Franz Hopper's previous desktop wallpaper just wasn't psychedelic enough.

One summer morning in the late 1830s, Franz Hopper punched the drunkenness out of a hobo, causing a shockwave that molecularly dismantled all alcohol within a 50-mile radius. Ground Zero is still known today as Salt Lake City, Utah.
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Postby Carth » Sun Sep 27, 2009 5:22 pm

Franz Hopper is the best of both worlds.

Franz Hopper is very hard to entertain. So, he created XANA for his own amusement.

Franz Hopper went back in time and prevented your parents from meeting, but was able to negate all paradoxes so that you would still exist.

Franz Hopper let me delete my own post and then repost it so I could revive this thread.
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Postby Asantewaalrus » Sun Sep 27, 2009 5:28 pm

I-I think I'm in love.

If you have five dollars and Franz Hopper has five dollars, Franz Hopper has more money than you.

Franz Hopper destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
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Postby SilverPrince » Sun Sep 27, 2009 10:12 pm

Once, when Franz Hopper was a teenager, he got bored and whipped up a crude operating system system in three minutes. Deciding that it wasn't awesome enough to be on his computer, Franz convinced some loser to buy it off of him. The loser's name was William. William Gates.

Franz Hopper can believe it's not butter.

Franz Hopper invented the hexadecimal system for encoding colors. Except for the shades of pink; Chuck Norris encoded those.
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Postby Sithking Zero » Fri Oct 09, 2009 12:45 am

Franz Hopper tried to make somthing that Mr. T Couldn't pity. XANA was born.
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Postby Carth » Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:29 pm

Franz Hopper is your father.

Franz Hopper can perform necromancy on every thread relevantly simply by showing up and taking off his glasses.

There are some things money can't buy. For DIY projects, there's Franz Hopper.
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Postby SearchingLyoko » Sat Dec 19, 2009 1:09 am

Franz Hopper is the only cluster of glowing orbs ever to be observed with glasses on.
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Postby TheAppleFreak » Sat Dec 26, 2009 10:09 pm

If Franz Hopper and Chuck Norris ever fought each other, the world would explode due to the sheer awesomeness of the fight.
I really gotta fix up this theme
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Postby Stonecreek » Sat Dec 26, 2009 10:20 pm

There are more undiscovered species of plants and animals in Franz Hopper's facial hair than in all of the world's rainforests.
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It's all very scientifical. |D


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Postby austronothrusclarki » Sat Dec 26, 2009 10:36 pm

Franz Hopper knows what Latin sounded like, and can speak it with a perfect native accent.

Franz Hopper doesn't need a crossbow to study Higgs excitation. (See http://xkcd.com/564/)
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Postby SearchingLyoko » Sun Dec 27, 2009 2:31 am

TheLordOfAppleFreaks wrote:If Franz Hopper and Chuck Norris ever fought each other, the world would explode due to the sheer awesomeness of the fight.


Franz Hopper would not fight. He would merely type into his keyboard and an army of clones would come out of the scanners to fight in his place. Of course they would not look like him, for nothing can be as good as the original. And nothing that is not as good as the original deserves to bear the image of Franz Hopper
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Postby austronothrusclarki » Mon Dec 28, 2009 3:08 am

Franz Hopper did not teach science at Kadic. He taught mind control. His students went on to be Nobel lauretes, hypno-therapists, astronauts, goddesses, martial art teachers, government spies, and combinations of the above.

Edit: Sorry Searching, error corrected. :discontent:
Last edited by austronothrusclarki on Mon Dec 28, 2009 3:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby SearchingLyoko » Sun Jan 03, 2010 10:58 pm

*ahem* Kadic.
___________________________________________________

Franz Hoppers beard would be much longer, but he didn't want anyone to confuse him with a frail old man.

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EDIT:

XND held me up by shotgun and told me to post this...

Franz IS Waldo.

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